Returns Don’t Exist in Europe the Way Americans Expect

Americans arrive in Europe with a quiet assumption: if something doesn’t work out, you return it. Not because you’re flaky, but because the US trained you. Retail has been competing on convenience for so long that “try it and send it back” feels like a basic consumer right.

Then you hit Europe and discover the difference between legal rights and retail culture.

In Europe, you often do have strong rights on many online purchases. But in-store returns can be far less automatic. Return shipping is frequently on you. “Free returns” exists, but it’s not always the default. And some categories Americans casually return in the US are treated as basically non-returnable unless there’s a defect.

So when Americans say “returns don’t exist,” they’re not being precise. The real issue is that the default expectation is different. The system assumes you measured, decided, and then bought.

That’s the shock. And it usually hits the first time you try to return something boring, like shoes that looked normal online but feel wrong in real life.

What Americans expect when they hear “return”

In the US, a lot of big retail trained people into a specific habit:

• Order two sizes.
• Keep the one that fits.
• Return the rest.
• No guilt, no friction, sometimes no shipping cost.

The customer experience is designed to make that feel normal. It’s a conversion strategy.

In many parts of Europe, the default is closer to:

• Decide first.
• Buy once.
• If it’s defective, you have rights.
• If you changed your mind, it depends.

That doesn’t mean nobody returns anything. It means the system is not built to make casual returns feel effortless.

And when you’re moving, setting up a home, and buying things fast, that difference becomes expensive and annoying quickly.

Online returns: you usually have rights, but it won’t always feel “free”

If you buy online in much of Europe, you often have a cooling off period for many distance purchases. That’s real, and it’s one of the strongest consumer protections newcomers bump into.

But Americans still get whiplash for three reasons:

1. You may pay return shipping.
   Even if the return is allowed, shipping is not always subsidized. You can “win” the right to return and still lose money.
2. The process can be procedural.
   You might need to notify the seller properly, follow steps, print labels, keep packaging, use a specific carrier, or return within strict timelines.
3. Exceptions matter.
   Custom-made goods, sealed hygiene items once opened, and certain digital content scenarios can fall outside the standard right-to-return logic.

So yes, you can return the item. But it can feel less like a customer perk and more like a regulated process.

That’s why Americans say “returns don’t exist.” The right exists. The convenience vibe often doesn’t.

In-store returns: where Americans get the real shock

This is the one that creates arguments at the counter.

In a lot of US retail culture, an in-store return for a non-defective item is treated as normal. You bring the receipt, you look reasonable, you get a refund.

In many European stores, “changed my mind” can mean:

• exchange only
• store credit only
• short window only
• unopened only
• not allowed at all unless faulty

It varies by country and retailer, but the baseline expectation is often stricter than Americans expect.

If you want a useful mental model: in-store returns are frequently policy-based, not assumed. The law is usually much more protective when something is defective than when you just regret the purchase.

So the key habit is simple: before buying in-store, especially for higher-priced items, ask what the return policy actually is. Don’t assume the cashier will smile and reverse the transaction later.

The hidden cost Americans miss: return shipping and “logistics tax”

In the US, free returns trained people to treat logistics like invisible magic. In Europe, return logistics often show up as real money and real time.

During the first months of setting up life, this is where people accidentally bleed cash.

A realistic example:

You order 8 things in a month because you’re furnishing and replacing basics:

• two pairs of shoes
• a bedding set
• a kitchen gadget
• a lamp
• a coat
• some storage pieces
• a small appliance
• random household basics

You return three of them because they’re wrong.

If return shipping is €6 to €10 each, that’s €18 to €30 that month, just in return costs. Not counting the time spent printing, packing, and dropping off.

And the bigger cost is psychological: if you keep doing this, you start feeling like the country is hostile, when what’s really happening is that the system is nudging you toward fewer speculative purchases.

In Europe, you often pay the friction directly. That changes behavior.

The categories that trigger the most “Wait, I can’t return this?” moments

This is where Americans get angry because it feels arbitrary. It’s usually not arbitrary. It’s mostly about resale, hygiene, and abuse prevention.

Sealed hygiene goods

If it’s the type of product that becomes unsellable once opened, many retailers and consumer rules treat it differently. Open it and you may own it.

Custom or made-to-order items

If you order something customized, it is often not returnable for “changed my mind.” This includes made-to-measure items and some special-order furniture.

Mattresses and bedding

Some sellers offer trial periods. Many don’t. If you assume a trial exists and it doesn’t, you’ll have an expensive lesson.

Big furniture and appliances

Even when returns are allowed, logistics can make it painful. Pickup fees, repackaging requirements, and scheduling delays can turn a return into a project.

Sale and clearance

Final sale is more likely to be treated as truly final. Not always. Often enough that you should ask.

If you want one simple rule: if the item is hygiene-sensitive or hard to resell, assume returns may be restricted unless clearly stated.

Europe’s “returns culture” is really about defects, not regret

Here’s the part that actually matters for living here: European consumer protections tend to become strongest and clearest when the item is defective, damaged, not as described, or fails too early.

This is why your approach matters.

In the US, many people treat returns as an extension of trying things. In Europe, if you want a remedy, you generally have better footing when you can say:

• it arrived damaged
• it is faulty
• it does not match the description
• it stopped working quickly
• it is missing parts

So the practical advice becomes boring and grown-up:

• keep packaging until you’re sure
• take photos immediately if something is wrong
• keep proof of purchase
• communicate clearly and quickly

This is not paranoia. It’s how you reduce arguments. The system is not designed to assume you are right by default. It is designed to respond to evidence.

Why this hits expats harder in the first year

In year one, you buy a lot:

• household basics
• clothing adjustments for climate
• shoes for walking cities
• appliances
• furniture
• new brands you don’t know yet

That’s when the return system matters most, because you’re doing higher volume buying while you’re still learning local norms.

If you keep shopping like you did in the US, you’ll create constant return friction:

• more shipping
• more packaging
• more time
• more refunds in limbo
• more “why is everything harder here” feelings

If you shop like locals, your buying becomes calmer:

• fewer speculative purchases
• more measuring
• more buying in person for high-risk items
• more loyalty to a few predictable retailers

It’s not about being conservative. It’s about reducing chaos while your life is already changing.

The money math Americans should do before they start ordering everything online

If you want to avoid the classic expat bleed, run a simple estimate for your first three months.

Assume:

• 6 to 12 online orders per month during setup
• 20% to 40% return rate while you learn sizing and quality
• €6 to €10 per return for shipping and packaging costs

That can look like:

• 2 returns x €8 = €16 per month
• 4 returns x €8 = €32 per month
• 6 returns x €8 = €48 per month

Again, not catastrophic. But it changes what you should do next.

If you keep racking up return costs, you’re not failing. You’re just shopping with the wrong assumptions for the system you’re in.

How to buy without becoming a joyless person who never tries anything

You don’t need to turn shopping into a legal research project. You just need a few habits that shrink regret.

• Buy basics locally first so you learn sizing and materials with your hands.
• Treat online shopping like a second step, not the first step.
• Favor retailers that clearly state returns and make them easy.
• Keep packaging until you are sure.
• Try items quickly. Don’t let the return window expire because you forgot the box.
• For big items, measure doors, stairs, elevators, and corners before ordering.
• For anything expensive, ask about return conditions before you pay.

A calm rule that works: if you are not sure and it would be annoying to return, buy it in person or don’t buy it yet.

The 7-day plan to stop getting burned by returns

Day 1: Make a returns cheat sheet

Write down return windows and conditions for the five retailers you use most. Just the basics.

Day 2: Pick two low-friction retailers for 60 days

In your first months, consistency beats variety. Find two sellers that behave predictably and stick to them.

Day 3: Buy a measuring tape

Measure the boring things: doors, stairs, your bed, your body, your space. Half the return drama is fit.

Day 4: Stop ordering “just to see”

If you want to browse, browse. If you want to buy, buy with intention.

Day 5: Photograph defects immediately

If something arrives damaged, document it the same day. This alone reduces headaches.

Day 6: Don’t break seals casually

If the category is likely to become non-returnable once opened, treat the seal like a decision point.

Day 7: Set your rules for high-risk categories

Examples:

• No furniture online unless pickup returns are included.
• No mattresses without a trial policy.
• No custom items unless you are 100% sure.

You only need a few personal rules to eliminate most regret.

The trade you’re really making

In Europe, returns are not always a lifestyle feature designed to encourage impulse buying. Online, you often have strong rights, but shipping and exceptions matter. In-store, “changed my mind” is more often a store policy question than a guaranteed outcome.

The trade is simple: the system asks you to do more thinking before purchase, and in exchange you do less post-purchase chaos.

If you adjust your expectations early, you stop feeling like Europe is hostile and start realizing it’s just less optimized for the dopamine loop of buying now and deciding later.